Style is not about money

Negative Nelly reminds me that this look costs a lot of money. Often Negative Nelly doesn’t know the brands featured but she assumes they cost a lot of money. Negative Nelly says she cant achieve this look as she doesn’t have the money for designer duds. Negative Nelly also claims that she doesn't have the time to achieve this look. 

This look has nothing to do with money.

I’ll repeat that. Because it’s important.

This look has nothing to do with money.

So what does this look have to do with?

To name a few qualities,  

Precision

Planning

Attention to detail

Meticulous maintenance

Good grooming including hair colour & style

Intimate knowledge of one’s style preferences, body shape & colouring

Perfect fit

Perfectly invisible foundation garments

Not paying attention to trends (unless they speak to you)

Quality over quantity

Head to toe consistency

I won’t go on about simplicity because that’s about personal preference.

Whether you are into “more is more” or “less is more”, the outcome will be just as chic, as long as you "get" the above list.  

You can do this look at any price point and exude the same image, style, look.

However you do need to invest time to make it happen and that means making your image a priority. If you choose not to make your image a priority, that's OK  too - different folks, different strokes but don't Negative Nelly me simply because it's not your priority.

By the way, the bag & shoes are Valentino and I am sure the dress is reasonably expensive too.

So yes, the individual items may be expensive, but I will insist til the day I go to the grave that this look has nothing to do with money.

CAN YOU SEE IT?

If not, I’d especially love to hear your reply. 

Being deliberate is being well dressed

Many years ago, someone said something to me about being well dressed and I have never forgotten it.

Interestingly, I have forgotten who told me, but the comment has stuck with me like glue.

The comment which was made to me was that "being well dressed requires one thing & one thing only - "to be deliberate about your appearance, from top to toe".

First lets clarify what this means & then I will give you a great example which recently came up.

In this image industry you are always hearing about wearing the right colours, knowing your body shape and dressing for it, knowing your style type and dressing for it, blah, blah, blah. These guidelines are all well & good, but ultimately if you want to summarise the "blah, blah, blah" into one phrase its "be deliberate about your appearance, from top to toe".

Being deliberate means that as long as you have thought about what you are wearing/how your hair/make up looks etc, then you ARE presenting the most appropriate "you" and this is what being stylish is all about. The knock on effect is that if you are well dressed, you will give the appearance that you care about "you" and others will respect and care about you too.

In the alternative, if you dress without putting any thought into your clothes, hair, make up etc etc, you will present sloppy and unprepared, like YOU dont care about "you". If that's the impression you choose to give out, how is anyone else going to care about you or respect you?

I certainly dont want the latter scenario going on in my life! Do you? I didnt think so.

Example

Lets look at the example I found recently - here is a recent photo of Elizabeth Olsen, the 23 year old aspiring actor who is the sibling of the Olsen twins, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen.




She is wearing:

Jacket - Chanel
Dress - The Row (MK & A's high end label)
Shoes - Chanel

When I posted this on my Facebook site and asked for feedback, readers came back with comments like:

- too old
- she should stop wearing The Row
- too boring
- a dont

No one posted anything positive.

Today I was in the city & having forgotten my camera, I had time to think about all sorts of things. This photo came to mind - random, yes I know, but its better than thinking about it in the shower, eh?

Nothing in this photo looks deliberate.



OMIGOD! Yes, that's it.

1. The hair isnt wavy & it isnt straight. It just looks unstyled.

2. The jacket and dress dont look co-ordinated - dont get me wrong - I am not talking about matchy-matchy - I am talking about having added an element to pull them together (even though they are separates) - maybe via some jewellery, a belt, something.....

3. Her neckline looks like she forgot something - jewellery perhaps?

4. The jacket looks too big.

5. The shoes, well they are lovely alone, but are cutting her off at the ankles.

6. It looks like she has put on a jacket, dress and shoes & walked out the door without even checking in the mirror.

7. Hey I wonder if she even put on any undies - oops, lets not go there.

This photo shows a classic non deliberate look. The "image" she is projecting is neither here nor there. It looks like she is in fashion no man's land.

I realise being deliberate in the way you dress does take time & effort - achieving anything good does. But considering how important your visual impression is, isn't it worth the time spent to be deliberate about your appearance?

Tips for being deliberate

1. Plan your clothes/accessories/look from the night before (especially if you work).

Frankly, this is my favourite part - I have collected so many beautiful things over the years, I deliberately think/rotate (especially my jewellery) so I dont forget anything.

2. Make sure the pieces you need for tomorrow are available, dont need mending & are not still sitting in the dirty laundry basket.

3. If you have worn an outfit in the past and it worked well, take a photo and place it on the wardrobe door, so you dont forget the elements that made it special. for next time.

4. Always keep a spare pair of hose at work (if you tend to wear hose).

5. No visible panty lines (VPL), no bra fat & get fitted for a bra every 2 years or if you have had a major body change (like gotten pregnant). No exceptions here.

6. Before you walk out the door, take a look at "you" in a full length mirror. No exceptions here.

7. Being deliberate applies to men as much as it does to women.

Where to from here?

Yes, I am making sure you dont miss this part.....

Of course being deliberate requires you to know what impression you want to make.

I have posted many times about "know thyself" - by knowing who you are and what you like, what you need and what you are comfortable with, you can then easily decide what impression to make. This is SO crucial to the big sartorial picture folks - I cant underestimate this enough.

If you happen to be uncertain about your "look" - perhaps in a bit of a fashion no man's land? - let me know - I can help you with this.

Once you know what impression you want to make, the next phase is to learn to use clothes/grooming to make that impression. I can help you here too! That's where body shape analysis, colour analysis etc comes in.

...and we'll cover this type of analysis in future posts too.....until then.....ciao

Dont be THAT GIRL

This post is dedicated to a friend of mine (she'll know who she is when she reads this), who knows not to be THAT GIRL. My nameless friend - keep the faith!

Lets go back a bit -

Anyone remember the US sit com That Girl starring Marlo Thomas?

Baby boomers & Gen X will say Yes!

Gen Y would perhaps remember the actress (without realising it) as Rachel Greene's mother on Friends......photoshopping & airbrushing aside, boy does she look great!....

Well, here's more of the detail....

That Girl was an American TV sit com which ran on ABC from 1966 to 1971. A lot of you wont remember it and I was certainly quite short at that time, but I have seen some of the re-runs.

It starred Marlo Thomas as the title character, Ann Marie, an aspiring actress, who had moved from a small town to New York. Despite sporadic employment, she managed to keep a spacious Manhattan apartment as well as an extensive wardrobe of mod fashions. Eye candy!

That Girl was the first sitcom to focus on a single woman who was not in a domestic or living at home situation and it is considered a forerunner to shows like Mary Tyler Moore & Murphy Brown and the feminist movement in Australia.

Ann Marie had a boyfriend and became engaged toward the end of the series but interestingly they didn’t marry by the final episode. Apparently, the decision to leave the couple engaged at the end of the series was largely the idea of Thomas herself. She did not want to send a message to young women that marriage was the ultimate goal for them.

Well, Ann Marie may have been a positive role model, but this post is about bad role models

This post is about not being THAT GIRL!

So I'm not talking about any 70's sit com character or actress!

In this context, THAT GIRL does things that make you go yuck!!!!

Here's the list....print it, paste it on your bathroom door or vanity mirror - memorise it....then avoid doing any of it, ever, ever.

• Poorly fitting clothes (too big, too small, cuffs too long, shoulders not sitting right, hem too short, hem too long, the list goes on)

• Chipped nail polish

• Laddered hoisery

• Hairy legs & armpits

• Unintentional messy hair

• Dragon lady fingernails
  
  
• Chewed, rough fingernails with unkept cuticles
  

• Open toed shoes with fine hose

• Unintentionally unco-ordinated clothes

• Unintentionally clingy clothes

• Unintentionally revealing clothes

• Dirty & scuffed shoes

• Chipped or worn down heels

• Unintentional see through or gaping clothes

• Out dated make up

• Lipstick on teeth
  

• Same hairstyle for at least 3 years

• Visible panty line (VPL)

• Noisy clothes or jewellery where noise isnt called for

• Inappropriate appearance (this is very broad..hehehe)
  

Alot of this stuff is just habit - get into the habit of not walking out the front door with any of these bad habits.

Do this for 21 days & it gets easier.

Dont be THAT GIRL!

I'd LOVE to here from you about more things that make you go yuck!!!!!